According to Merriam-Webster, uncomfortable means causing a feeling of being embarrassed or uneasy.

The word uncomfortable is one of my least favorite words in the English language – mainly because it is a word I heard often while I was married, but I digress. While I was searching for inspiration for this blog, I stumbled upon a question that made me think; “Are you comfortable/happy at your current size?”

The question made me ponder over how I truly feel about myself. I know I exude confidence when I am dressed to the nines, and I am quite comfortable when I am wearing sweatpants and tee shirts. But, am I really happy or comfortable wearing a size 18 dress?

Between the ages of 11 and 17 I was extremely uncomfortable with my appearance. I didn’t feel pretty and I was larger than most of the females that were around me on a daily basis. I didn’t begin to feel comfortable in my skin until I turned 18 and I lost a few pounds. I went from wearing a size 16 to a size 10. Even though I felt more comfortable than I had before – I still battled with self-esteem issues and I wasn’t completely comfortable with myself.

I can remember happily shopping in the junior’s section of Macy’s with my mother before going to work at Little Caesars. It felt great buying and wearing those little clothes. My confidence began to grow as I realized I was being noticed and admired by the opposite sex. As the years passed and I entered the corporate world in my mid-twenties, the pounds started to return. But, as I started gaining weight my confidence didn’t fade. If anything, I became more confident and self-assured. Now, almost forty and the largest I’ve ever been – I’m more comfortable than I was at the age of 19 wearing a size 10.

But, if I am going to be completely honest with you – and me, I was the most comfortable when I wore a size 16. Seems odd because it is only one size below what I currently wear. However, certain body parts seemed to jiggle less and weren’t as puffy when I wore a 16.

So, what is the takeaway? I think the aforementioned question is great and I think we should all take the time to ponder over it. It offers us the opportunity to discover what we think determines our comfort. And once we know our comfort level – do we need to do something about it? Because what’s the point of being uncomfortable, that’s why I’m not married anymore.

Until the next time, be you and most importantly…love you.

Being uniquely you is being uniquely beautiful.

-B.B.