Like most words, reflection has several definitions. There are two that stand out to me; A thing that is a consequence of, or arises from something else, or serious thought or consideration.

I made a collage of four photos of myself from 2009 to 2016. In all honesty I was amazed to see that I look younger now at 40 than I did at 36. But, after reflecting on what was going on in my life in 2012, I should not be surprised. I faced the most challenging obstacles in my life during that time period, but I survived.

This collage is a reminder of the strength that resides within me. In addition to the importance of not only valuing my happiness, but ensuring that it exists within me.

As I reflect on these selected years of my life I can see my emotional state was captured in each photo.

In 2009 I was living in Miami and I was loving life. Everything wasn’t perfect, but I was happy. At 33 I was at a place of comfort and acceptance of myself. I was self-assured and confident.

I was 36 in 2012 and I wasn’t happy about a damn thing. Don’t get me wrong. I was grateful for life, but some of the choices I made back then didn’t provide a flowery bed of ease for me. When I look at the photo from 2012 I’m smiling, but my eyes were telling a different story. My eyes were screaming, “I am unhappy!”

Between 2010 and the early part of 2013 I battled with some demons that I thought I had overcome. During those years, my self-esteem began to diminish. I questioned my self-worth and my ability to do nearly everything I had previously mastered. It is apparent to me now that the real me was still present – she had become dormant and silent.

I cannot say exactly what transpired within me. It was if the strong and confident woman who I grew to become got tired of the negativity and attempts to break me. She had enough, and with the love and support from those who care about me, I began to smile again.

I want to stress to everyone reading this to be happy. Life is entirely too short to be miserable. Having said that, I want to encourage you to find your happiness within you. Don’t look for it in someone else or in things. Make it about you. Simply because when people leave and the things are no longer interesting, all you will have is you.

Until the next time, be you and most importantly – love you.

Being uniquely you is being uniquely beautiful.

-B.B.