About a year ago I learned that I was the subject of daily conversation amongst my colleagues – or at least my clothes were. I was told a group of people would gather and wait for me to pass by to see what I was wearing. I was described as, “that heavy-set dark-skinned chick that can dress,” apparently they didn’t know my name.
Since I am a peacock, I liked hearing it, but it was pleasing to me for deeper reasons. For starters, I was mentally able to accept every part of the description as a compliment. There was a time when I hid my body because I thought it was unattractive and I didn’t want to be seen. To be perfectly honest—I thought all of me was unattractive, including my dark skin. But now I know better.
Recently, I saw a Hydroxycut commercial that irritated me. The following statements were made in the commercial: reclaim your closet, reclaim your confidence, and gain more opportunities. Excuse me Hydroxycut —these things are possible at any size.
By no means am I against anyone who is trying to lose weight to be a healthier being. However, I am against statements that suggest one cannot be confident, have wonderful opportunities in life, or have a fabulous closet unless they look a certain way.
Confidence is a feeling of self-assurance arising from one’s appreciation of one’s own abilities or qualities. Which, any body can own and express. You can be confident if you are skinny, fat or in between.
There are several opportunities we can take advantage of on a daily basis. I have experienced a lot of wonderful opportunities that had absolutely nothing to do with the way that I look. And my closet literally overflows with great clothes.
I have matured into a confident woman who is exposed to a plethora of opportunities. Furthermore, I am one of thousands who display this. I am tired of society sending the message that certain body types cannot be attractive and exude confidence, and the idea that we should be ashamed of ourselves because our bodies don’t match some ridiculous standard—#effyourbodystandards . I was ashamed of myself at one point in my life and I refuse to ever feel that way about myself again.
Not only will I do all I can to prevent negative thoughts and feelings about myself, I will do what I can to help others fulfill the same goal.
And I am sending a huge thank you to those colleagues who labeled me #ThatHeavysetDarkSkinnedChickCanDress!
Until the next time be you and most important—love you.
Being uniquely you is being uniquely beautiful.
-B.B.
